Tag Archives: Cafe Clementine

You Say Sandwich and I Say…Sandwich

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This is how they do it at the Times (above).

Mid-blizzard, juke box lights glowing warmly, the door to the Lunch Encounter swung open and in stepped Barbara Stratton, in a hat, stomping snow off her boots. Barbara’s got a sandwich groove on at Cafe Clementine and she stopped in to spread the good word.

“Porketta,” she whispered. “And gowda.” Screen Shot 2015-03-03 at 8.15.20 AM

“Really,” thought I. We love em both but know them in culinary pig Latin apparently. Gooooda. And porchetta, emphasis on the CH.

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If it roasts slow and low, as her porchetta does, we want in, so  I peppered Ms Stratton with questions. Details. I need the details. Must. Reproduce.

Barbara elaborated, “The sandwich idea was given to me by the butcher at Cronigs. He told me he has eaten it several times in Philly and in his opinion it beats the cheesesteak hands down. I made a few sandwiches with the left over porchetta. They were good but I think they were raised to total EAT ME status by the long hot. I was poking around looking for the sandwich on Philadelphia food sites when I discovered the pepper. It is delicious and easy because you don’t peel or de-seed and it adds a little heat which lands with a yeah!! on the tongue.”

I think she skipped a few steps. My tongue watered, my brain rained pork fat and I was cornfused.

“So, um, what’s on it?” I wondered with deep desire. And what’s it on, I pondered, dreaming of New York breads. There is always always some spectacular and new New York bread source, doncha know. Outloud I said, “Porchetta, long hot and…?”IMG_1638

“The long hot gets its stem removed. Then toss in olive oil and salt and roast until blistered.”

Gotcha.

“We blanch the broccoli rabe, stir fry in oil with garlic and cool. The broccoli rabe needs to be covering most of the pork in a thin layer because you want a yummy taste of everything in each bite.”

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Aha. Will do.

Grandaisy Bakery is in my neighborhood- or just use something that has a nice platform and will toast up crispy.”Screen Shot 2015-03-03 at 8.46.34 AM

“We reheat in a hot oven until the cheese melts-about 7 minutes. Also leave the lid off of the sandwich so it has a chance to toast.”

IMG_1637Nice platform, lid off, done.

And the meat, the meat, the meat, who is the mistress of the meat? Melissa Clark, mebbe?

“Yes,” she confirmed, “I used the “Melissa Clark recipe from the Times. The epiphany struck me after I spent 40 minutes scoring the fat on the one I made on the Vineyard. USE A SERRATED KNIFE! It works like a charm and is no big deal. Just make sure that the fat is cold.”

“I’m gonna set a day aside and dedicate myself to this affair,” sez I grandly.

“Alas,” Ms Stratton warns me, “the porchetta is a two day affair, what with the time to marinate and all—you could make/assemble all of the components on day one, then roast the pork and assemble the sandwich on day two. Also, don’t use a really aged gouda-too overpowering. Just a middle aged and a thin slice-the poke is the thang. ( I did ramp up the crushed red peppers and garlic in Ms. M’s recipe.)”

 So, to recap. One two three GO!

Bottom of ciabatta brushed with oil and a long hot, pork, broccoli rabe, aged gouda, top of ciabatta.

“Happy eatin!” sez B.
One teensy dete stickin’ in my craw. Did she say provolone or gouda??
And have I mentioned that Barbara is the best cook I know? She is a cook among cooks and we are talking peaks.
 
 

Toast Poast Number Two One Six

Scientists today revealed the mathematical formula for a perfect slice of toast, showing that it is best cooked for exactly 216 seconds. A team of researchers carried out a study which found the optimum thickness is 14mm and the ideal amount of butter is 0.44 grams per square inch. The recommended cooking time gives the slice a ‘golden-brown’ colour and the ‘ultimate balance of external crunch and internal softness’.

 Joan Rivers’ Toast

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Joan says two minutes will do. She’s fast at 120 seconds and you better believe her toast was fabulous to the f. To her instructions I would add: You might fluff your feather mules  Screen Shot 2014-09-09 at 4.02.23 PM or adjust your peignoir Screen Shot 2014-09-10 at 7.51.50 AM while waiting for the toast to pop.

The Huffington Post chimed in with, Rivers also took the time to point out that in the event of a “holiday or special occasion,” raisin bread could be substituted for the white bread, in which the recipe name would then change to “Joan Rivers’ Holiday Toast.”

“I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.”
Joan Rivers

You turn my bread into buttered toast, Joan, and we will miss you terribly.

It has the look of ‘builder’s tea’ and, crucially, the outside is 12 times crunchier than the middle. The result is achieved by setting the toaster dial to ‘five out of six’ on a typical 900-watt appliance to produce a temperature of 154 degrees Celsius, the study revealed. Bread expert Dr Dom Lane, a consultant food researcher, spent one week toasting and tasting a staggering 2,000 slices for his research, in his bid to assist the nation’s toast eaters.

Thank you, B of Cafe Clementine, for the dopamine uptick, as always. You turn our bread into pecan-studded sticky rolls and you are the funniest girl we know. 

A Rose Amongst the Posies

In a churchyard on a hillside
Where the flowers grow and twine
There grow roses amongst the posies
Flowers for my Clementine

“There are churches, and there are Churches. And if you’re not in a spirit filled church, then you’re not in any church at all.”

There are sandwiches and there are sandwiches. The sandwiches at Cafe Clementine (formerly Cafe Columbine) in New York are fer real.

Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, Clementine!
Thou art lost and gone forever
Dreadful sorry, Clementine

Light she was and like a fairy,
And her shoes were number nine
Herring boxes, without topses,
Sandals were for Clementine.

Drove she ducklings to the water
Ev’ry morning just at nine,
Hit her foot against a splinter,
Fell into the foaming brine.

Fer real? That’s how the song goes? I had no idea.  Does the proprietress of Cafe Clementine know about this?

Ruby lips above the water,
Blowing bubbles, soft and fine,
But, alas, I was no swimmer,
So I lost my Clementine.

Oh well. Too bad. Let’s eat!

 
How I missed her! How I missed her,
How I missed my Clementine,
Till I kissed her little sister,
and forgot my Clementine.

Jeez.

Clementine? What Clementine? Sandwich? What sandwich? Gone! Poof. On to the next.