Souf Pork Triumvirate

One day we had a half day of school so we were spending the afternoon with my grandmother. I don’t know where my sister was but my brother Ron will back me up on this.

First I have to tell you about my grandmother Esther. Her real name was Willy. I have no idea why she was named that. Her mother was an Indian and named her children things like Willy and Whinney and Otis (pronounced Ah-tis not O-tis) and some other weird stuff I can’t remember right now. She was the youngest and they were all dead before I came along.

Nobody liked my grandmother, she was a mean old b*tch. Her 2nd husband was named Orville Stilley, and I guess Willy Stilley would not work, so she took Esther from the Bible, which should tell you a little about her.

She fancied herself a plain old-fashioned country girl, but since she moved to the big city during World War One, by the 1970s (when this happened) the country girl stuff was wearing thin.

So, anyway, my “Uncle” Orville picked me and my brother up from school and took us to their house. When we walked into the kitchen there were 2 pig heads sitting on the table. Grandma was busy with a spoon, digging the eyes out of one. She had cut a bunch of meat off the faces and was frying it up for our lunch. So we sat at the kitchen table eating while she cut more meat off the faces and fried it for a second helping. After that I could always pretty much eat anything.

So if you really want to make class memorable get a pig head and a sharp knife.

I told that story to my friend Greg about 15 years ago, to this day all I have to say is Pig Face to make him turn green and run from the room…